Find Strength, Keeping Hope: Journey of Well-Being As A South-Asian Woman
Written by Arvinder K. Sodhi
By starting a non-profit organization, withGRATUS, we have created a space where we can talk openly about mental health, no judgment, just education and support and most importantly the resources of where to get the help that is needed!
Hello Everyone. I am someone who dives right in when talking about resilience, empowerment, and the journey to mental wellness, especially for women like me who are not what they appear to be! Life throws us curveballs, and I feel that together, we've got this!
I am grateful for the opportunity to share my journey with you - in hopes that you find reasons in your own life to keep using the muscles of your inner strength!
Growing up, I connected with free-spirited individuals and those who saw ME and not my brown skin and docile look. In our South Asian community, there's often this pressure to conform to traditional gender roles – to be the dutiful daughter, sister, wife, and mother and that list goes on. However, my upbringing at home did not prepare me for what society expected me to be. I was raised to think beyond barriers. When life threw me a curveball in the form of a life-altering accident, I decided it wasn't going to define me. With a lot of faith and inexplicable power of resilience, I took charge of my narrative.
In South Asian communities, there's this pervasive idea that women should stick to certain roles – that our value lies in our ability to care for others. Well, although I take tremendous honour to be gifted this ability of caring, I also have been able to demonstrate areas where it can be used for so much more. We're strong, capable, and can excel in whatever we set our minds to. By embracing my own strength and resilience, I let go of these gendered expectations and paved the way for other women to do the same. I do not shy away from topics that are typically reserved for the males in our community. Construction, Real Estate, Finance and Investing, DIY, Home Improvement, Career and Business, Legal, Current Affairs and World events had always been of interest to me, and areas of the newsPAPER that I seeked out!
South Asian women are often told to put family first and the needs of all family and extended family members first - putting aside personal goals, ambitions and careers. This is a real struggle, it involves a lot of inner searching, dreaming, seeking answers and validation. I discovered the juggling act during my marriage, raising children, personal initiative to help support family growth and real desire to be in entrepreneurial and leadership roles as well as staying true to the tenets of my faith and incorporating a pillar of Sikhism: Sewa; Selfless Service.
Disability carries a heavy stigma, especially in our culture. People with disabilities are often treated as less than, as if their worth is somehow diminished because of their condition. And so I faked it for as long as I could. I pretended I was just as normal as anyone else, and very few people along the way ever knew that anything had ever been “wrong”. The pressure of this was HARD WORK, overcompensating, pushing all of my limits and ignoring my personal boundaries as well ignoring my health. By overcoming the need to appear “normal” I showed that people with disabilities are just as capable – and deserve just as much respect – as anyone else. Disability doesn't define a person – it's just one part of who they are. I often feel that being South-Asian, being aware of the stigmas, may have inspired me to push as hard as I did, seek the tools I needed, which also led to success. It’s hard to say at this point for me if the cost out-weighed the benefit for me - I continue to work on this for myself!
Mental health? Well… it's a bit of a taboo topic in our communities. By starting a non-profit organization, withGRATUS, we have created a space where we can talk openly about mental health, no judgment, just education and support and most importantly the resources of where to get the help that is needed! It's okay to not be okay – that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. I encourage others to join me in breaking down the stigma surrounding mental illness and creating a more supportive and understanding community.
I wish to prove that we, South-Asian Women can be strong, successful, and ambitious while still being loving wives, devoted mothers, and supportive daughters.
Through my life journey, I've met some amazing people who get it – they understand the struggles, have great resources to share, and are there with a listening ear or a hug. I decided that this is where I fit in comfortably: breaking barriers, finding strength, and paving the way for women just as many before me have done in order for me to see the path.
Join us at withGRATUS if you are a service provider or seeking services as we continue our mission to support mental wellness and reduce the stigmas. More about me: https://www.youtube.com/live/N38s3GicQ74?feature=shared
